Aboard Zapp Brannigan's ship. Zapp is talking to Kif.
Kif: Why are you in a pleasant mood, sir?
Zapp: I heard that my lover, Leela, was arrested a few nights ago for attempted murder. I've also heard that I've been given the job as judge in her trial.
Kif: What does that mean, sir?
Zapp: That if convicted I can sentence her to spend a few days with me.
[Futurama theme]
Back at Planet Express.
Leela: Professor, I told you NOT to build those robotic duplicates of the crew!!
Leela is referring to a time when Farnsworth built robotic duplicates of the crew as an experiment. However, Leela's robotic duplicate escaped from Farnsworth's lab and went on a killing spree.
Farnsworth: I'm sorry, Leela, but I never thought that a robotic duplicate could escape and go on a killing spree.
Leela: What am I going to do about the trial? How can I escape it without being convicted?
Bender: Lie.
Fry: Tell the truth. It was a duplicate of you that attempted to murder someone. Also, take a lie-detector test to prove your point.
Farnsworth: I'm sorry, Fry, but lie-detector testing machines were banned in 2428 after it was discovered that they were accurate only 50 percent of the time.
Leela: I'm doomed, can anything else go wrong?
Bender: Then you haven't heard?
Leela: What?
Bender: Just that Zapp Brannigan is going to be the judge for your trial.
Leela: NNNNOOOO!!!! He'll never belive that a robotic duplicate of me attempted to murder someone!! Who knows what his sentence is going to be if he succeds in convicting me!! He might even make me sleep with him again!!
Bender laughs.
Leela: Shut the hell up, Bender!!
The next morning. Leela's trial is about to begin.
Zapp raps the gavel.
Zapp: Miss Leela, you are charged with attempted murder. How do you plead?
Leela: Innocent.
Zapp: Then the prosecutioner will call his witnesses.
Later, after the witnesses have spoken.
Zapp: The evidence against Miss Leela is strong. Ladies and Gentlemen of the jury, you may begin your deliberations.
The jury walks out of the room. After ten seconds they return.
Jury member: Your honor, we have reached a verdict. We find the defendant......GUILTY!!
Zapp: Miss Leela, I sentence you to spend the night with me!!
Zapp raps the gavel again.
Leela: NNOOOOOOOOOO!!!!
Zapp[to some guards]: Guards, take her to my ship.
[commercial break]
Leela and Zapp are at the Nimbus, about to eat dinner. Neither of them know that the "potatoes" on their plates is really swamp root. They taste their potatoes at the same time, and become very attracted to each other.
Leela: Hey, Zapp, you look very sexy.
Zapp: I know, so do you.
They fell into each other's arms and they hugged, kissed, and headed for the Lovenasium.
Screen fades to black, and text on the screen says: "The next morning."
Leela's eye opens in an extreme close-up which zooms out to reveal that she's lying down. Without her clothes. Under the covers. Next to Zapp Brannigan. In a red, heart-shaped bed.
Leela: AAAAAAHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!
Zapp[awakened by Leela's screams]: Good morning, lover.
Leela: AAAAAAHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!
Zapp: Now that we have done it twice, you are truly my woman. Ever since we did it last, I knew that sooner or later, you would come back for more sweet, sweet candy.
Leela dressed herself as he said that.
Leela: I can't your filthy ass anymore!! Why are you always after me like this?!
Zapp: Because you are a hot alien babe. I am going to be after you until I can finally marry you!!
Leela: I refuse to marry a jackass like you!! If you had not acted like a pompous dimwit when we first met, I would have been a little more open-minded.
Leela storms out of the Lovenasium, finds a videophone, and calls Planet Express. Seconds later the PES docks with the Nimbus, Leela gets on it, and the trio head back to the PE building.
Fry: All of us missed you! How badly did Zapp treat you?
Leela puts her hands over her face from shame.
Fry: Oh no. You didn't do it again with him did you?
Leela: I don't know. All I remember is that after eating one bite of potatoes last night,I became very attracted to him.
Bender: My God! What you ate last night wasn't potatoes at all! It was swamp root. Swamp root causes uncontrollable desires for the nearest member of the opposite sex near you.
Leela: What could possibly go wrong?
Text on screen:"Two months later." Leela has been puking every morning for the last two weeks. She also has a bad temper, can't stand classical music, and has a frequent need to use the restroom.
Fry: Shouldn't you see a doctor about your problems, Leela?
Later, at the doctor's office.
Leela is sitting at the table and the crew is around her. The doctor walks in with results from a test on her stomach.
Doctor: Miss Leela, congratulations. You are going to have a baby.
Leela: WHAT?!!
Bender: Whose the father?
Doctor: According to the test results, it seems that the proud father is......Zapp Brannigan.
Leela: NNOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!
[commercial break]
Back at Planet Express.
Leela: Oh my God! I can't have a child!
Fry: How about talking to Zapp?
Leela: No way, forget it. I refuse to be his wife.
Bender: What do you mean?
Leela: Zapp said that if I came to the Nimbus once more, he would see to it that I stayed and married him.
Fry: What do we do now?
Leela: I don't know. Giving the child to adoption is my last resort.
Farnsworth: I guess this is what he meant by punishing you for something you didn't do. Making you a happy mother.
Leela: This is mostly your fault too!! If you hadn't built those robotic duplicates, I wouldn't have had to spend a night with Zapp!!
Text on screen: "Over the next seven months." There is a time lapse that shows Leela's stomach getting larger and larger until finally she goes into labor and the crew rush her to a hospital.
Later, after the baby is born. Leela sees that he has purple hair with blonde highlights, Zapp's nose and mouth, and Leela's eye.
Leela: At last! I am not the last cyclops in the universe!
[Roll credits]
