It was a very unusually hot day for the month of December in the days preceding the millennium. The thermometer read 80 degrees and was climbing higher and higher. Philip Fry was asleep when his alarm clock blasted into his ear. He woke up and fell out of bed with a shout.
Fry: “Ouch, that hurt.” “But I have to get up anyway because my parents are coming over.” “Hey, Michelle can you come here?”
Michelle: “What do you want Fry?”
Fry: “Can you get me some groceries when you go out?”
Michelle: “Sorry, Fry but I have to go to work.” “You do know what work is don’t you?”
Fry: “I have a job you know.”
Michelle: “If you call that lousy job at Pinuzi’s Pizza a job?”
Fry: “Okay, I’ll go out to the store and buy the groceries for Christmas Eve dinner.”
Michelle: “Goodbye Fry.”
As Fry leaves a man comes out of the closet and starts to kiss Michelle.
At the supermarket Fry picks up a turkey and a ham.
Fry: “Now which one should I choose?” “Should I choose you the turkey or you the pig?”
Little Kid: “Loser.”
When Fry is done picking up his food he waits in a long line at the checkout counter. Cashier scans all of the food.
Cashier: “That will be $108.97.”
Fry: “Wow, that’s a lot of money for a turkey and some canned yams.”
Cashier: “It’s the holidays now are you going to pay or what.”
Fry: “I only have $13.78.”
Cashier: “You can get this.”
He holds up a bag of potatoes with bugs crawling around inside.
Fry: “I guess I’ll take it.”
Cashier: “Good choice.”
At his apartment Fry puts the potatoes in a pot of boiling water and starts to watch the pot boil. Just then he hears a knock at the door.
Fry: “I’m coming, I’m coming.”
He opens the door to see his mom and dad.
Mom: “Good Evening son, stand up straight and stop slouching.”
Dad: “Yes son, now give me 20 pushups for your insubordination.”
Fry: “Yes sir.” “One, Two, Three, etc.”
Later they are gathered around the dinner table just before the potatoes are ready.
Mom: “So Philip where is that lovely girlfriend of yours?”
Dad: “I still can’t believe that she hasn’t dumped you yet.”
Mom: “I know, just look at the mess you make Philip.”
Dad: “Now what do we have to eat?”
Fry: “I’ll go get it.”
Fry brings out the potatoes.
Mom: “Potatoes, I hate potatoes and what is this inside it?”
Dad: “Oh my god it’s a bug and it’s not alone.”
Mom: “I am leaving.”
Dad: “Goodbye son.”
Fry: “I hate my life, I hate my life.”
